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Europe in a Box

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Page # 1: England/Spain - Page # 2: France/Italy/Hamberg - Page # 3: Netherlands/Belgium/Berlin

Page #3

Four years in Hotlanta, and finally we are reunited again. Todd is Silogical, and Hamsterland wasn't ready for us.

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Our hostel in Hamsterland looked like it was made for migits. David Bowie should have been whaling on the staircases that required full montain climbing regalia.

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There was no shortage of rats with wings. One of the most obvious but amazing ideas I saw was the public urinal. You just walk up and pee like you're weighing yourself on a scale, well a smelly sticky scale. Imagine: people aren't embarrassed that they pee. The USA isn't ready yet.

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I thought I should emphasize to the little girl in the stroller that this fence holder was indeed a likely candidate for personification.

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Extremely important building with big fake lake in front of it.

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Hamsterland's bluelight district is filled with the seediest creatures of the night.

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We were determined to keep it real by starting a b-boy scene on the corner. This made us automatic experts on the local club scene to anyone passing by. We happily directed many tourists to an industrial hardcore bar that the doorman would never let them into.

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One drunk guy busted up his head trying to dance with us.

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It took us a rejection or two before we realized that to get into a club you just have to walk in fast brushing the steroid monger aside.

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With smiles on our Hamsterdam faces, we headed to Antwerp for some Belgian waffles and some trendy fashion. On trains you get really close to people you would never otherwise know. This is a good time to fart really loud.

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I saw some inspirational fasion ideas. But this was an art exhibit.

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I like the idea of big useless zippers. I think we are all infatuated with the magic of the zipper, whether it unveils a crotch or closes up a jacket to keep warm.

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This fashion store had a slide to get to the next floor down. Elevators are clearly a waste of time. They should have these in the white house.

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We really liked this bigass clock tower.

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Like Marseille, Antwerp had some fantinspirational happy nests. This is called something like Mance Court, and the murals are smashing. Check out the alive report (big AVI, wait a minute for download.)

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A well muraled habitat brings out the caveman nature in everyone. This always leads to fun. This was the funcraziest mural. I think the artist would have called it Monsters Tew.

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In Berlin, this wooden elephant sat amidst a thriving Turkish district.

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You know for goddamned sure you're not in the USA when you see a freaking solar powered gas station.

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The Berlin wall is totally covered in graffiti. Whoever drew this mural of a dude jumping the wall ran with his middle finger up all the way to the Stalin bank.

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Between the two walls, where there used to be mines, tanks, and barbed wire, there is now a beach party. Oh communism...

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There is a parliament-like building in Berlin that is solar powered by an upsidedown cone of solar panels. Also, it makes a good backdrop for dancing really silly. See the video.

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As if to taunt the already patient German people, I couldn't leave their government dance floor without f-ing it up in a truely rediculous fashion. See the video (Big AVI, wait a minute for download).

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