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Stuff People Said to Me

"jay, you need to give me a quote on your site and it needs to go something like this, 'when life gets tough, the tough get life. Put that in your back pocket and smoke it. life is like a 'round the corner. the donkey is a strong man. jeeze. cheese... cheddar? remember that ugly tit. you are too if i am see that it. ?why? if only kid John Mayer; isnt not his j ___ =.< /...dj ke ifh linoleum dfa;odi890iokl,'" (Beau Silver - July 22, 2004 - Miami, FL)

"I love opening up new rolls of toilet paper becuase I feel like I'm opening up a birthday present" (Jodi Finch - July 12, 2004 - Cocoa Beach, FL from the bathroom)

"My armpit smells like peanut butter." & "I remember once the ice cream man tried to holla at my mom.  I was devastated." & "If u were to have sex with a blck girl, as a white dude, would u have sex with her cause u think she's cool, or would u have sex with her cause she thinks she's cool and also in the back of ur mind ur going oh she's a black girl, i'm fucking a black girl?" (T. B., on instant messenger - Dec 5, 2003 - Boston, MA)

"You'll just have to let technology do its thing." (Ryan Littrell, in response to Jay's frustration with waiting for an email - Nov 25, 2003 - Berkeley, CA)

"If you send me Smarties [the candy] I will forgive you for childhood torture." (Soleil Konkel, writing to me in England from the U.S. - June 3, 2003)

"I stepped on a bum the other day, and that has sustained my happiness for a few days." (Mike Nichols - May 30, 2003 - Atlanta, GA)

"Ganache" (Charli - May 21, 2003 - On an official document (cleverly alluded to in a previous email) - Cambridge, England)

"Rain outside this room makes soft noise under the music, but I can't see it." (Matt Carlin - May 18, 2003 - Cambridge, England)

"I don't respond to social pressure." (Faye Karababa mocking what Jay Silver said to a person who challenged his line butting behavior - Many times after Spring Ball, Feb. 14th, 2003 - Cambridge, England)